(This post comes from former ASQ Reliability Division chair Dan Burrows, who was ousted from the cult professional society for questioning their financial dealings. Lesson: if you join a multilevel marketing scam, never ask about the multilevel marketing scamming. The original post is on LinkedIn here and is reposted with permission; as in permission from Dan, not ASQ, obviously. I only added last names, all the other content is from the post. — Chris Paris)

A General, a Lawyer, and an IT Guy walk into a Milwaukee bar…

Bartender Paul – “Hey Bill, Ann, Sid, the usual?”

Bill – “Golden martinis. Still goes nicely with my three stars. My consulting is so-so, but I get two retirement checks being retired from the Army and ASQ.”
(Bill [Troy] was ASQ’s CEO from 2014 to 2019 losing $4M and 10,000 members while pocketing $2.3M.)

Ann – “Make mine a double.”
(Ann [Jordan] started as ASQ’s lawyer in 2018 and became CEO in 2019 losing $11.5M and 25,000 members while pocketing $2.1M.)

Sid – “Rough day, Ann?”
(Sid [Bhatagar] started as ASQ’s CIO in 2020 and became CEO in 2023 losing $7M and 10,000 members while pocketing $1.5M.)

Ann – “The drive up from Chicago was brutal, but not as brutal as we have been to ASQ’s finances and membership. Now I’m ‘transforming’ another nonprofit.”
(Ann is now CEO of HFMA where she makes ~ $1M per year.)

All laugh heartily.

Jim from the end of the bar – “I lost thousands of ASQ members and most of ASQE’s members and I still can’t figure out how to not lose money even though you handed ASQ’s certification and training revenue over to me.”
(Jim [Templin] started in charge of ASQ Membership in 2017 where he lost 10,000 ASQ members then became CEO of ASQE in 2020 where he has lost $3M and hundreds of ASQE’s Organization members while pocketing $2.8M.)

Bartender Paul – “Don’t take it so hard. I rode the wave of quality in the 1980’s and membership soared and the money was flowing. I even bought the ASQ HQ building that you just took a $7M hit on. Just make sure that you get out while the getting is good.”
(Paul Barowski started as ASQ CEO in 1986 and ASQ’s membership did surge to 150,000, but by the time he retired in 2014 he lost 75,000 members and $15M while pocketing an estimated $10M.)

Jochem and Grace from across the bar – “The getting is still good, thanks to Paul. He changed ASQ’s rules so that board members could make money off ASQ. Nothing like “volunteering”, Cha-ching!”
(Jochem and Grace are ex-ASQ Board members who are estimated to have each pocketed over $1M from ASQ.)

All laugh heartily.

Bill – “Another funny thing is that none of us had any association management experience before the ASQ Board put us in the CEO seat!”

Sid – “Not only do I not have any experience, ASQ still doesn’t provide 24/7 support and I just poured money into Quincy, ASQ’s new AI bot that that scoops up user’s data. We did suspend dues to Sections and Divisions, which violates tax law, right Ann?”

Ann – “We’re above the law. ASQ has been filing IRS Form 990 statements for years that don’t disclose our misdeeds. The law is for threatening the gullible, like when I coerced the ASQ Board into signing off on “ASQ Transformation” else they’d be held personally liable.”

All laugh heartily and order another round – Put it on ASQ’s tab!

(The information above is from ASQ and ASQE IRS Form 990 filings that are publicly available https://lnkd.in/gJvSVGx9 )